A Note, For You.

I deeply believe that you and i share a certain kind of wonderful bond but when it comes to truly thinking about it, it appears to be the loneliness that thrives for comfort within us.

Are we easy targets, or is it the fact that you are copious amounts of all I’ve ever hoped and dreamt to be found in another human being, of which i could easily concrete my love inside?

During my day-to-day agenda my mind often doesn’t stick to the activities which were planned, instead my mind rapidly wanders off to the places you and i speak of, of the times we want to spend together.

I’m never going to be able to turn my thoughts into speech, so just know this;
You’re extraordinary and i could really grow to love you immensely.

I wish

I listened to my own advice.

She Never Understood.

A friend of mine asked me, out of the blue whether or not I thought of myself as a ‘quitter’. Although i knew what she was referring to, i just had to ask what she had meant just so i could explore her explanation. She mumbled out “You gave up on love after two years, what if it was about to reach you?”. My answer didn't stumble out, it was blurted out. All i could reply to her with was whoever i was waiting for just wasn't coming, that i had tried everything for him to love me and he, well, just couldn't. I’m not a quitter at all and I never saw myself as one, but someone who wanted to be happy without love and carry on hoping for someone else to love me.

You said goodbye.

Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting.

Wake Up.

Dont bother with me, im as unrealistic as i seem.
Yes, i do live in my dreams, nothing else is real.
This is the way it’s gonna’ be.

Faithless and Weightless.

I am nothing without you.

Explanation.

The melodramatic waves that are carried around everywhere inside my pockets are not for sympathy but for something far from it. I am constantly engaged in a difficult search for something positive to take, to help deteriorate the pain i possess. As if it were a lolly, shrinking in size by melting in your jean pocket during its half-weekly wash.

I’m using this cycle as a seemingly-happy search for aliveness as a way to renew my broken heart.

ps. Claire is this less depressing for you?

Truth Be Told

Recent Bio

Negativity is seeping into my mind so rapidly lately that I’m starting to grow insane from knowing but not controlling it. Its feeling like isolation and hate kindling into a heart-shaped ball. I dont believe I’ve ever grown this cold or been so uncontrolably self uncontrolable, ha. It’s bugging me severly although I know it’s one of those stages where it’ll pass through even more quickly then it came and stayed.

“Everything blows over eventually”

I loved you

But I left you anyway...